After living for almost twenty one years, it safe to say that I have been slacking on some important task and now it is trying bite me on my butt.
I know that in the past years I have been dodging numerous situations that requires important decisions. Choices are yet to be chosen and plans are still as vague as to what goes first in the bowl, the cereal or the milk? The decisions that should have been made in the past are haunting me now.
For the most part of my life, I only decide for short term goals. I have never imagined myself five or even more so years in the future. Being a simple, kind and helpful citizen was my only long term goal back then.
One of the important decisions that I dodge was my college course. Back when I was in fourth year high school, I have no idea what work I wanted and I know not all folks out there work with their profession but we take college degree hoping we’ll work in that certain line of job, right? Another problem I had in choosing was I did not know what subjects and what level of knowledge in certain fields I should have in order for me not to struggle too much and for me not to go into “try hard” mode ever freakin’ semester! Anyway, I chose Agricultural and Biosystems Engineering because I really wanted science in general but I chose this predominantly because all my boy batchmates chose engineering course(Not to blame them or anything but peer pressure men! I gots me! LOL!). Looking back at that moment I wrote “BS Agricultural and Biosystems Engineering” in my application form as my first option makes me crack up and laugh a little(my second choice was BS Biology for those who are wondering ;D ). Another fun fact, I really does not have any plan for my life back there and only applied in on one university! Gosh! I am so dumb!!!
After four years, I am currently meters deep in this sh*t hole. Don’t get me wrong. I liked the course! In fact, I love it! The problem is that I am struggling. I know most of the time I might not giving it my best but I just feel that I really wanted to do other things and learn other stuff… The question that is running in my head right know is “Should I just let time pass by and bring me to the next phase of my life or should I bring myself there right now and start making my decisions for my future?”. Maybe I just need to try a different approach in life because I really feel stuck in a loop hole and every single day is just the same like every other day….